Today marks 2 years since Praven was the recipient of a brand spanking new healthy kidney, the kidney of course being mine. Its almost unimaginable that it’s been that long, and at the same time that its “only” been that long. It seems a lifetime ago that he was on dialysis, before Thavina was born, and when most things were entirely too complicated.
I can’t say that the road has been smooth and hassle free, but i can definitely say that it’s been an integral part of our story. Praven has amnesia, and can’t remember the dialysis days, but as dictated by my female (or is it elephant) DNA, I haven’t forgotten.
I remember the hardship of not only Praven dealing with his illness, but me being the person dealing with the person dealing with the illness. I don’t want to go into it all now, but i definitely look back at it and feel a huge sense of gratitude that it is something behind me.
For now we have managed to get so much back that we lost during those years, simple things like family outings, weekends away and even just breakfasts together. I am grateful to everyone, even if some of those relationships are now quite strained, for being with us through those years and through the transplant. Friends and family that wished us well and checked on us regularly. I might get on your nerves eventually and you might think “Oh No, this story again!”, but this is a lifelong achievement for us, each check up he goes for, and even each time he goes to the loo, is a reminder to us.
I don’t often thank medical aid, because they can sometimes make all of this unnecessarily difficult, but at the end of the day I am thankful that they were able to make the dialysis, testing, transplant and all his post transplant treatment happen. You wouldn’t believe the cost of all of this.
And the end of it all I breathe a heavy sigh of relief, and look forward, towards all the new goals we want to achieve, and all the dreams we want to make come true. Now we have the “space” for all the regular everyday stuff, you know, kids, school, supper and all that amazing chaos we get to call “Our Family.”
We need to do something outrageous to mark this… Praven… I’ve been thinking, I might like another tattoo….
PS – No, funnily enough I don’t ever feel like I want it back… 😛
Firstly… errr… NO.
I recently read an article on the pros of not only eating as a family but also on preparing meals together.
Benefits such as lowering rates of obesity and drug use, and positively impacting a child’s identity, self-esteem and values, while teaching manners and etiquette.
My question is, has the author ever prepared a wholesome meal with a 3 year old, while taking the time to enjoy the “moment”, stay calm and instil values in said 3 year old. Keeping in mind this article was written for a “little kiddies book club”, the target audience would be parents of toddlers.
I definitely agree that mealtimes allow for the family to catch up, bond and stay connected, and is important when your kids are little and as they grow up. I definitely do enjoy the random lets make cupcakes, or blue-cakes moments, those make for great memories and form special little traditions. Just this past Christmas Thavina helped me make stuffing for the turkey, she did ask me why we needed to break up bread (only about 50 times) and ran the size of each and every crumb past me for an inspection before adding it to the bowl, but hey, it was Christmas and a time for family and fun.
But I cannot even wrap my head around coming home from work and finding the patience to ask my 3 year old if she wants to help mummy cook supper, I have a hard enough time putting it together on my own.
I do hope as the kids get older I remember that meal prep time can actually be a somewhat chilled bonding experience, but for now its
“dinners ready… eat your food… go to your room”
Anyone care to share tips on including little ones in daily chores, be it mealtime prep or something else, is it something I even need to stress about?
In our house, we do our best to minimise any form of rivalry between Kivesh and Thavina. When we found out we were expecting Thavina we immediately fostered a protective role for Kivesh as “The Big Brother”, not to take away from Thavina, who is a pretty protective little sister. We try our best to be consistent and equal with praise, discipline, treats and treatment. I find it creates an attitude of fairness amongst the 2 of them, and has prompted them to look out for each other. We still try to make them feel special on an individual level, Thavina and I go shopping together, or Kivi and I go for a movie (we call them “only child moments”), and it works out great.
The kids obviously still bicker about certain things, “he’s talking to me”, “she’s standing on my railway track”, ” but I want the blue crayon”… (we may have a few snapped in half crayons in the house, from when I lose it and go all “Judgement of Solomon” on them) But I’m glad to say that at this stage we’ don’t have any real rivalry to speak of.
That is… until the music comes on. we play almost every other song, especially the Disney ones, twice. Once for Kivesh to listen to, and a whole separate time, for Thavina to listen to and sing a long. She apparently cannot listen to it, if buddy is listening to it. So every morning we listen to the Moana soundtrack twice, except the crab song, because Thavina doesn’t like crabs…
Can you argue with this face…
I’m complaining but I’m not really complaining because as far as rivalry goes, I’ll take it, and I do get to sing along with Dwayne Johnson every morning, so its a win.
PS – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79DijItQXMM – You’re Welcome – Moana – Dwayne Johnson